‘The Father’ — Dementia is a Maze with No Way Out
Anthony Hopkins is astonishing as the aging, mentally ill dad.
Both of my grandfathers had passed away years ago. I considered them — and myself — lucky that they’ve only suffered from physical health issues, not mental ones. It was sad to see their health deteriorate, but I knew it was still the better option — if you can view something as better in one’s slow death.
What I mean is they didn’t have dementia or Alzheimer’s. If you Google those sicknesses, you’ll see that Alzheimer’s is the most common cause of dementia — although the latter isn’t a specific disease as opposed to Alzheimer’s. Regardless, they both mean you lose your goddamn mind. You begin to mix up things: faces, places, memories. You slowly start forgetting who your wife, parents, and children are. And, eventually, yourself.
Dementia and Alzheimer’s are the ultimate mental diseases. They can rob us of our most valued thoughts, secrets, and feelings. Things that no one else could take from us despite their power or authority. If we can’t remember sacred life moments, the very things that define our core personality, we’re better off dying.
A life without memories isn’t worth living — it’s a maze with no chance to ever get out.
Having dementia means we need to wander in that maze for a long time before realizing that we are stuck and getting out is only an illusion — a shocking and terrifying one.
Florian Zeller’s latest drama, The Father — adapted from his 2012 play Le Pére — is about that long walk inside the maze. An excruciating process of learning that there’s no escape.
Through our protagonist’s mental condition, we witness how human consciousness turns against us. That an ill mind can make a cruel and grotesque joke about our very existence, setting up a punch line that will tear down the world we thought we lived in.
If I haven’t previously known that The Father is a drama about an aging man with dementia, I would’ve easily called it the cruelest mindfuck film of last year. An internal psycho-thriller. If the creators tweaked it a little — adding suspense, violence, and jumpscares to it — it could’ve become a creepy horror like the Australian Relic was earlier last year.
But no, The Father is a real-life horror — one that could happen to you, me, or our loved ones at any time.
Anthony is a retired, proud father who lives in his private flat in London. His daughter, Anne (Olivia Colman), visits him after she learned that Anthony snapped at his caretaker Laura and made her quit. Anne tries to convince her dad to reconsider, but Anthony tells her that Laura stole his watch and she had to go. He also explains that he needs no assistance. He’s feeling fine and well — he just can’t seem to find that damned watch of his for days.
Anne tells him she’ll be moving to Paris to live with a man she started dating. Anthony laughs at her, thinking it’s a joke. His daughter is married for years. Or is she having an affair? He’s not sure. After Anne leaves the flat, a man named Paul (Mark Gatiss) shows up unexpectedly. He says that Anthony lives with him and his wife Anne for months now. Anthony is baffled, confused, puzzled. He doesn’t understand how he can’t seem to remember his daughter’s husband.
When Anne returns with the chicken she bought for dinner, Anthony doesn’t recognize her because she’s a completely different woman. Who is she? What kind of mean game do they play with him? Has everyone around him gone mad, crazy, and insane?
At one point, Anthony grows angry and begins yelling that he’ll never leave the apartment. The truth is he can’t. The home he lives in is a perfect symbol of his sick mind. A mind that trapped him. A mind that keeps him in doubt of what’s real and what’s not.
He’s drifting between memories. He forgets some of them and then relives others over and over again on a loop. In that flat, time is elusive, incomprehensible — at one moment, it flows, and in the next, it shifts, cracks, and collapses. Dementia is an unpredictable river that floods when we least expect it. And every time it does, it takes snippets of our minds with another wave.
The Father’s biggest strength is its perspective. It’s told from the point of view of an unreliable narrator. We learn every bit of information alongside Anthony. We try to solve the puzzle together, although we aren’t sure what piece goes where. It frustrates us just as much as it frustrates him. Dementia is a devastating mental state that knocks you over and makes you fall without ever really landing.
Hopkins is astonishing in the role. Every move, gesture, and sound he performs is so genuine, so frail because he’s able to merge with the character in a split second. His theatrical talents align perfectly with cinematic intimacy and make us feel like we’re watching a man we’ve known for decades. Anthony, the character, could be our grandfather. He’s witty and wise, charming yet brutally honest, loving but strict and dominant at the same time. He has those typical old-man traits I recognize because my grandfathers had them, too.
The ending of the movie is uncomfortable to watch. It’s not sentimental or melodramatic. It’s just painfully honest with brutal realism. It reminded me of my grandfather’s last day in the hospital when I said goodbye to him. He was weak, barely able to speak, and wearing an adult diaper. The once strong and charismatic man, respected by his whole village, was lying in a bed and spoke with the shyness of a child. It was undignifying. Some part of me still wishes I’d never had to see that, but I’m grateful for the chance to say goodbye.
Anthony Hopkins is nominated to win the Oscar for his role. I doubt he’ll get it, but he’d utterly deserve it. I don’t think he’d ever been so vulnerable in his life-long career, and that earns recognition.
If you want to see a living legend at his greatest, go and watch The Father. I guarantee it’ll be worth your time.